Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Monday, December 28, 2009
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Friday, December 25, 2009
Thursday, December 24, 2009
This and extreme sledding are the only reasons I miss snow
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
— Marilyn Thomsen
Via Bits of Wisdom
Monday, December 21, 2009
I posted this thinking about how my mom called me a couple of months ago and told me that she found my snake that had "ran" away while I was in high school. 11 years later she finds the petrified snake while moving a bookshelf. Gross. Just gross.
p.s. she didn't save it or take a picture. ugh
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Monday, December 14, 2009
Follow-up from earlier post....there will be more
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Except Number 33.
1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
2. Don’t worry about what people think, they don’t do it very often.
3. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian anymore than standing in a garage makes you a car.
4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
5. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never tried before.
6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
8. A person who is nice to you but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.
9. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.
10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
11. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
12. A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good.
13. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
1 4. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.
15. No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes.
16. A balanced diet is a muffin in each hand.
17. Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
18. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
19. Junk is something you’ve kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.
20. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
21. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
22. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
23. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.
24. Someone who thinks logically provides nice contrast to the real world.
25. It ain’t the jeans that make your butt look fat.
26. If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved it’s full potential, that word would be ‘meetings’.
27. There is a very fine line between ‘hobby’ and ‘mental illness.’
28. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
29. You should not confuse your career with your life.
30. Nobody cares if you can’t dance well. Just get up and dance.
31. Never lick a steak knife.
32. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.
33. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.
34. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
35. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that deep down inside we ALL believe we are good drivers.
36. Your friends love you anyway.
(Via Skip's House of Chaos)
Monday, December 7, 2009
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Friday, November 27, 2009
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
The first one says to the second that the average person knows very little about basic mathematics.
The second one disagrees, and claims that most people can cope with a reasonable amount of math.
The first mathematician goes off to the washroom, and in his absence the second calls over the waitress.
He tells her that in a few minutes, after his friend has returned, he will call her over and ask her a question. All she has to do is answer "one third x cubed."
She repeats: "one thir -- dex cue?"
He repeats "one third x cubed."
"One thir dex cuebd?"
"Yes, that's right", he says.
So she agrees, and goes off mumbling to herself, "one thir dex cuebd... one thir dex cuebd... one thir dex cuebd..."
The first guy returns and the second proposes a bet to prove his point, that most people do know something about basic math. He says he will ask the blonde waitress an integral, and the first laughingly agrees.
The second man calls over the waitress and asks "What is the integral of x squared?"
The waitress says "one third x cubed" and while walking away, turns back and adds with a wink "...plus a constant."
(via Miss Cellania)
(via Interesting Pile)
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Saturday, November 21, 2009
I’ve learned that I like my teacher because she cries when we sings “Silent Night”.
I’ve learned that our dog doesn’t want to eat my broccoli either.
I’ve learned that when I wave to people in the country, they stop what they are doing and wave back.
I’ve learned that just when I get my room the way I like it, Mom makes me clean it up again.
I’ve learned that if you want to cheer yourself up, you should try cheering someone else up.
I’ve learned that although it’s hard to admit it, I’m secretly glad my parents are strict with me.
I’ve learned that silent company is often more healing than words of advice.
I’ve learned that brushing my child’s hair is one of life’s great pleasures.
I’ve learned that wherever I go, the world’s worst drivers have followed me there.
I’ve learned that if someone says something unkind about me, I must live so that no one will believe it.
I’ve learned that there are people who love you dearly but just don’t know how to show it.
I’ve learned that you can make some one’s day by simply sending them a little note.
I’ve learned that the greater a person’s sense of guilt, the greater his or her need to cast blame on others.
I’ve learned that children and grandparents are natural allies.
I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.
I’ve learned that singing “Amazing Grace” can lift my spirits for hours.
I’ve learned that motel mattresses are better on the side away from the phone.
I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a man by the way he handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.
I’ve learned that keeping a vegetable garden is worth a medicine cabinet full of pills.
I’ve learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you miss them terribly after they die.
I’ve learned that making a living is not the same thing as making a life.
I’ve learned that if you want to do something positive for your children, work to improve your marriage.
I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.
I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catchers mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back.
I’ve learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you. But if you focus on your family, the needs of others, your work, meeting new people, and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you.
I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with kindness, I usually make the right decision.
I’ve learned that everyone can use a prayer.
I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one.
I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love that human touch-holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.
I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn.
Via Bits of Wisdom
Friday, November 20, 2009
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Monday, November 16, 2009
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Friday, November 6, 2009
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Monday, November 2, 2009
Friday, October 16, 2009
Friday, October 9, 2009
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
I stopped biting one fingernail last week and decided that I could quit one nail at a time. Right...I killed it this afternoon.
Friday, September 25, 2009
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
I only scored 40%. I thought I would do a lot better...I have seen every episode multiple times.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Monday, September 21, 2009
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Friday, September 18, 2009
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Monday, September 14, 2009
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Friday, September 11, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
The funny thing is, this article denounces social networking sites as ruining communication (I agree). At the bottom of the page there is a link to follow the author on Facebook...
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Monday, September 7, 2009
If you click on the Mel Blanc link it takes you to one of my favorite web sites The Straight Dope.
It is probably in your best interest to get your information from Cecil instead of the Learn Something, because it obviously lists some erroneous information.
I started this blog because every morning I would send out about 50 emails to various friends of anything that would interest them. Some people had trouble opening my links, and some started to think I had nothing better to do with my time then send emails. This morphed into a laborious process, so I had the idea to combine them in to one place. There are other career related objectives here, but I won't bore you with that.
Anyway, for those of you that know me, you know I don't like to get mushy. However, I would like formalize this. Thank you.
Friday, September 4, 2009
Thursday, September 3, 2009
Ok, The pictures are awesome. They really paint a picture. However, I am DEEPLY disturbed that the dispatcher let this lunatic keep talking so long and did not send a deputy to write her a ticket for a phony 911 call. Sometimes when you call 911 you are put on hold. THIS IS WHY.
I just read an article in EW about the Seinfeld reunion spanning a few episodes of Curb Your Enthusiasm. I have never watched the show. I'm sure I would love it, I quote Seinfeld at least once a day... ANYWAY, I will be sure to check on this as it transpires.
I know this guy (hard to admit). I have heard that there is more to the video, and I want to know if anyone has the ending; or where to find it...
Monday, August 31, 2009
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Monday, August 24, 2009
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Friday, August 21, 2009
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Saturday, August 8, 2009
Friday, August 7, 2009
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Friday, July 31, 2009
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Monday, July 20, 2009
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Friday, July 17, 2009
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Monday, July 6, 2009
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Friday, July 3, 2009
I am not scared of heights, but I might get a bit of vertigo up there...
50 successful open source projects that are changing medicine (via) Tara this one is for you…