Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Misheard Song Lyrics




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Clean Up on Asile 4

http://i.imgur.com/mRYWI.jpg


Happy Halloween

A man is walking home alone late one foggy night... when behind him, he hears Bump... BUMP... BUMP... Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him. BUMP... BUMP... BUMP... Terrified, the man sprints toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him FASTER... FASTER... BUMP... BUMP... BUMP... He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in and slams and locks the door behind him.
However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of the casket clapping-clappity-BUMP... clappity-BUMP... clappity-BUMP... on his heels, the terrified man runs.
Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.
With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door. Bumping and clapping toward him. The man screams and reaches for something, anything, but all he can find is a bottle of cough syrup!
Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket...
and.......
The coffin stops

Underwater




Brooklyn Subway, This is very surreal, like from a movie, but it’s real, unfortunately.




So glad the lights were on to show the way.. <facepalm>




 Brooklyn Subway, This is very surreal, like from a movie, but it’s real, unfortunately.

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Didn't You?


Confusing


STOP IT THIS IS SO CONFUSING IT HURTS




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Double Chin

http://i.imgur.com/SoEmh.gif




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Pouring Water on a Plane

http://i.imgur.com/lpivG.gif




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Yro'ue

http://i.imgur.com/IpFX8.jpg




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Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Building Collapse in Chelsea





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Hurrycaine

http://i.imgur.com/ZYE4y.gif




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Mandarin

Mandarinception[via] 




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Reasoning





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Need Help?





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Macauly Culkin

 


Good Ideas

Business Ideas:

Auto body shop called "Wreck-a-Mended"

A pub named "The Pint of No Return." 

A furniture store called The Ottoman Empire

A military themed gay bar called: "The Dishonorable Discharge"

Bicycle repair shop called Broke Bike Mountain

An abortion clinic named "Don't Kid Yourself"

A tattoo parlour called "Ink, Inc"

 A Greek restaurant called The Silence of the Lambs



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Wallpapers 10/30/12



 





 







Something Funny





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Two men and their dogs

Two men, tom and bob were walking their dogs when they smell a delicious scent.
"You smell that?" tom asked. Bob replied, "the heck I do, let’s find where it’s coming from!”
After 5 minutes of searching, the scent led them to a restaurant.
Tom said "let’s get something to eat!" they both were hungry but bob reminded him that they couldn’t enter with their dogs! so tom said "It’s cool, follow my lead!" he puts on shades and is stopped at the door "no dogs allowed sir!" tom insisted "oh it’s my seeing eye dog let me in" "it is? But that’s a dachshund !"
"Yes they're using them now because of their amazing sense of smell"
"Very well come in." bob puts on shades and also stopped before entering
"No dogs allowed sir!" the waiter heckled.
"Oh please forgive me, it’s my seeing eye dog" bob apologized.
"A chihuahua?!!!" the waiter shouted
"what??? THEY GAVE ME A CHIHUAHUA!?!?!?!?!?!?!"

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Word Problems

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Zoos

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Pool Fails





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5

http://www.dumpaday.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/funny-dumpaday-pictures-130.jpg

Lost Item




 

This Little Piggy





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Romney Face





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Detroit Rule





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Taxi Cab

A businessman takes a vacation in Vegas. He has a horrible run of luck, and spends his life savings and maxes out his credit cards. All he has left is his airline ticket home.
Getting into a taxi, he explains his plight to the cabbie. He offers to leave his drivers license or anything else until he can mail the fare to the taxi driver.
"You ain't got ten bucks for the cab fare to the airport? Get out of my cab!" yelled the taxi driver.
The man walks to the airport, flies home, and for the next year, he works very hard, and builds back his fortune. He goes back to Vegas, and this time he wins big.
Feeling good about himself, he steps out of his hotel to leave for the airport. At the end of a long line of taxis, he sees the cab driver who refused to help him last year in his hour of need.
He immediately figures out a way to get even with this guy.
He gets into the first taxi and asks what the fare to the airport is. "Ten dollars." says the driver. He then asks how much for a blow job. "What? Get out of my cab."
He proceeds down the line of taxis repeating the process and getting the same results.
He finally gets into the cab with his old friend, and asks him how much to get to the airport. "Ten bucks," says the driver. "Good." he says to the driver.
And as they cruise past all the other drivers in their cabs, he gives them all a smile and a thumbs up.

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Things to say at work

Things to say at work




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Phone Contacts





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What's Gravity?

http://i.imgur.com/oud6R.gif




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Double Take

http://i.imgur.com/p40Py.gif




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Impatient Drivers

thereluctantoptimist:

clawedrockdawg:

dukeofmegadeus:

here’s to impatient assholes



Too FUNNY! I should feel guilty for laughing so hard at this… but I don’t.


I love someone who gif thinks like me.





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The Bear

mightycocainebears:

- John smith




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Halloween Decorations: You are doing it right





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Escalators Man





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