Saturday, November 30, 2013


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What's Your Elf Name?



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http://i.imgur.com/aH2fOUX.jpg?1




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Man Arrested 1,250 times

http://i.imgur.com/K2XgJVS.jpg





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Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Posting Update

Hey everyone - I just moved, so posts will be slow for the next couple of days.  I am waiting for my internet.  Don't cry, I will be back in business very soon.  Probably Friday. 

Saturday, November 16, 2013

Amazon Milk Frog


Read about it here

Epic Stunt


Jean-Claude Van Damme performs an epic split between two moving trucks to demonstrate the precision and directional stability of the new Volvo FMX truck. Video Notice the trucks are going backwards?

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Canyon Accessible


CandH

Murder trial

A man is on trial for a double homicide, and the judge is reading the charges.

He says "Mr. Smith, you are being charged with murdering your wife with a chainsaw."

A man in the audience yells out "You monster!"

The judge continues "You are also being charged with murdering your mother in law with a hammer."

The same man in the audience yells "You bastard!"

At this point, the judge turns to the man in the audience and threatens to throw him out of the courtroom if he yells again.

He says to the judge "I'm sorry, your honor, it's just that I've been this man's next door neighbor for years, and every time I ask if I can borrow his tools, he says he doesn't have any."


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Friday, November 15, 2013

Camouflage




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Wake Up!



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How to Cook a turkey


Stand Back


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Teach your daughter to shoot



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In the locker room

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cellular phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen.

MAN: "Hello"

WOMAN: "Hi Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"

MAN: "Yes."

WOMAN: "I'm at the shops now and found this beautiful leather coat. It's only $2,000; is it OK if I buy it?"

MAN: "Sure, go ahead if you like it that much."

WOMAN: "I also stopped by the Lexus dealership and saw the new models. I saw one I really liked."

MAN: "How much?"

WOMAN: "$90,000."

MAN: "OK, but for that price I want it with all the options."

WOMAN: Great! Oh, and one more thing... I was just talking to Janie and found out that the house I wanted last year is back on the market. They're asking $980,000 for it."

MAN: "Well, then go ahead and make an offer of 900,000. They'll probably take it. If not, we can go the extra eighty thousand if it's what you really want."

WOMAN: "OK. I'll see you later! I love you so much!"

MAN: "Bye! I love you, too."

The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are staring at him in astonishment, mouths wide open. He turns and asks, "Anyone know whose phone this is?"


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Thursday, November 14, 2013

Beware of this scam



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Stranded

An Englishman, a Frenchman, and an American get stranded on an island.

They are taken captive by the natives there, bound, and dragged into a tent. After about an hour, the chief of the tribe comes in.
"I have good news, and I have bad news," he tells them. "The bad news is we are going to kill you, eat you, and make your skins into canoes. The good news is you get to choose how you die."

The Englishman asks for a gun. "Long live the Queen!" he says, and shoots himself in the head, and dies.

The Frenchman asks for poison. He lifts the glass, says "Viva la France!", drinks, and dies.

The American asks for a fork. The natives are confused, but they hand over a fork. He starts stabbing himself all over with said fork... his arms, legs, torso, everywhere.

"What are you doing?!" The chief asks finally, perplexed. The American grins at them.

"So much for your canoe, you assholes."



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5 Life Rules



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Learn to drive people


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