Saturday, April 15, 2017

Reddit Asks: What is the best marriage/relationship advice you have ever received

  • The work in every relationship should be split 60/40, with both people trying to be the one giving 60%. 
  • Big things build the structure, little things fill in the gaps. Do the small things.
  •  You can love a lot of people, but it doesn't mean you're meant to be with any of them.
  • When arguing, it's "Us vs. the problem" instead of "me vs. you." Fight with your partner, not against them.
  •  Even if you're married, never stop dating your spouse. Love is active.
  • Don't do anything that will make the other persons day more difficult.
  • Communicate constantly. Talk about money. How you spend it, what you owe, what you'd like to do with it. Keep each other accountable. 
  • Also, never ever belittle your partner, especially in front of other people. And speak up for your partner if they need it.  
  • Date someone that when they see you, their eyes light up and get excited. Eyes are also one of the best communications of love, the way couples look at each is a good indication of their feelings. Work together, never put your partner down, never manipulate them. Be honest with them. Finally don't stay with someone that doesn't look out for your best interest, be with someone who helps you grow. Don't ignore red flags because of love, help them if you can but he fair to yourself and leave to protect yourself.
  • When you argue in front of someone, make sure that you apologize in front of them too. It helps people see that your relationship is not only arguments. This is especially true if you have children, as they need to see peaceful conflict resolution, and not just the conflict. 
  • Don't make it all about the children. They won't be around forever, but the two of you will.
  • You should not have a relationship that is 'give-and-take'. A relationship should be 'give and receive' because if you are taking you are not giving them a choice. If you are receiving then they are gifting you their love.
  • To make things work you need to take all those things you hold against them. All the things that you don't like about them. The list of things you think about every day. Now forget about them. Because if you are constantly thinking about those things, then you will not see what good things they do for you. 

There is more here if you want to read the rest: What was the best marriage/relationship advice you have ever received?

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